Financial Security Bulletin
A Scheduled Execution in the Supreme Victory Square
An attempted robbery was carried out yesterday within the National Commercial Bank of Port Mabel by a very unloyal bank clerk working alongside two thugs believed to be from the inland district of Toad’s Parish.
The clerk, Horace Benoit, abused his position to disable the locking procedures before closing hours at the bank. The crazed conspirators intended to seize as much money as possible and flee by lorry but the San Tibio Armed Forces (STAF) patrols intercepted their vehicle outside Toads Parish village limits. Two suspects ran into the extremely thick brush, but Benoit was easily captured because he tripped.
President Paul Mango, Custodian of the Nation and Defender of Public Order, issued a statement this morning:
“A nation without discipline becomes a jungle of thieves. The people must visibly witness the consequences of betrayal.”
The Central Office therefore announces that Horace Benoit will be publicly executed in the Supreme Victory Square, Port Mabel, next Tuesday at approximately 3:15 PM following elementary school dismissal so the youth of San Tibio may observe the importance of the security of our great island’s banking system.
Teachers are instructed to maintain orderly lines while approaching the square. Children are reminded not to touch security barriers or military vehicles.
The Ministry of Currency Stability reminds citizens that suspicious financial behavior should be reported, particularly:
unnecessary lingering near vaults,
unusual interest in lock schedules, or
whispering of any kind within banks
Trade operations at the bank resumed this morning under armed supervision. Citizens may collect wages as normal.